A Rainy Sunday Afternoon Post...and the Laundry Pile is Calling...Go Away, Mom Guilt!
Updated: Dec 19, 2021
It's raining outside. A rainy Sunday afternoon sounds like the perfect time to work on my novel. Imagine it: the soft pitter patter of raindrops on the windowsill, a hot cup of coffee/tea, and the perfect music playing. It sounds like the ideal recipe for a great writing session...unless you're a mom. LOL.
If you're a working mom like me, you know that the above scenario is more than likely a fantasy than reality. There are the exceptions. Some moms can do it all. I have a really great husband who supports my writing, so this isn't a rant or whiny article about never getting time for myself.
However, I am sitting here with a mountain of clean laundry in front of me. Put it all away, my brain tells me. She's the logical part of me, you know. Oh, just do a bit of writing. You've earned in, says my heart, the part of me that usually wins. After all, if I waited to write until everything was clean and finished...I'd still be cleaning without writing a word. Ever.
Take it easy out there, Moms. Let the Mom Guilt go. Did you notice how I capitalized it there? That's because I know just how prominent and persuasive it can be. Mom Guilt is the enemy of all hard-working moms. Whether you work a full-time job, part-time job, or are fortunate enough to get to stay home with your children...Mom Guilt finds you. It can destroy the very best of intentions by attacking you for even spending five minutes by yourself. Those five minutes could've been spent reading your child a story, right? Now your kids won't learn to read well, Mom Guilt tells you. How about the times you find joy watching your children playing only for Mom Guilt to swoop in and remind you that you're not in the floor engaging with them? Don't you love them? How selfish can you be?
If that sounds absurd to you, consider yourself lucky that you don't suffer from an overactive imagination and a key talent for overthinking. For those of you who resonant with this and can relate, welcome to my blog. You're not alone. I am a military spouse, a mother of two, a full-time kindergarten teacher, and an indie author with a passion for writing. My family is my whole world. Yet, I'm surprised to see how many moms are out there feeling like this sometimes. And I'm here to tell you: take five minutes for yourself today. Even if it's just a hot shower. Know your worth, Mom. There is truth in the fact that you can't care well for others if you aren't taken care of. If you want to write, write. If you want to read a book, read a few pages. The children are fine. The house is fine. Even if you finish the laundry, guess what? By bedtime, there's more. And the day after that. And the day after that. You'll never be done, but don't take that as a negative. Use that to fuel your motivation for why you should take time for you. Here are some ideas I've done recently that have really helped balance out my family, work, and writing time.
- Take a bubble bath.
- Listen to your favorite type of music.
- Do what you love for 15 minutes (that even includes a power nap if you need to)
- Smile
- Pray
- If you're a writer, write.
-If you're a reader, read.
-Watch a favorite movie (a secret of mine is to watch my favorite movie while I'm cleaning. Since I know it so well, I don't have to actively watch it and can be productive around the house at the same time)
If for some reason this doesn't apply to you, or you don't see how you could possibly use this advice, that is okay too. It's not for everybody. And if you're struggling, I hope you find what does work for you. Life is such a gift. I am a Christian, and I truly believe in God's healing and love. He provides for and blesses me daily. I am so thankful to Him. When I feel powerless or Mom Guilt (aka, the devil) is trying to tear me down despite my best efforts, I remember my worth. I know the type of mom I am. I give 10000% to my children. I can certainly afford to give myself a piece of it too. So, here's to the moms out there who need a little pick-me-up. You're doing great! Cheers.
...Okay, I can fold the laundry now.